First of all, let me officially welcome you to 2021! Did your life radically change when the clock struck midnight? Were you even awake? No shame if you decided to tiptoe your way into the new year.
I spent my night in a pretty mellow fashion. I am still recovering from a bout of the flu and chose to stay in and make it an early night.
You might say I was practicing some of the specific areas of emotional intelligence. Self-control, delayed gratification, and self-awareness.
A few years ago, I might have felt I was missing out by not going out and staying home alone. Now I realize that prioritizing taking care of myself is far more important to going out for one night.
IMPROVING YOUR EI
Deciding to take steps to improve your emotional intelligence will pay off in both your personal and professional life. It doesn’t matter if you’re an athlete or an executive, growth in emotional intelligence will benefit you long term.
Studies have actually shown that your emotional intelligence is a higher factor in long term success than your IQ.
How do you know where to start though if the concept of emotional intelligence is fairly new to you? I find when working with clients the easiest way to identify what area of emotional intelligence to focus on first is often what can have the greatest impact in their life. Very often once you see the way people respond to you when you have put in the work, it makes you want to do more.
The specific area of focus will be different for everyone, but some areas of consideration might be self-confidence, impulse control, empathy, and stress tolerance.
Once you have found an area that resonates with you it’s time to get to work!
THREE SIMPLE STRATEGIES
1. DO A BIT OF RESEARCH – If you are completely new to EI and not working with a coach, I always suggest getting to know your topic a bit better first before you dive in headfirst. Once you have decided which subsection of EI you want to start your focus on I would suggest doing a bit of reading. Pick up a book. Become educated on the subject. I promise it won’t hurt. I’m always happy to make recommendations. Daniel Goleman has written several books on the topic that are considered to be well respected.
2. WHAT IS YOUR END GOAL? –Are you trying to get a promotion? Land a better job? Control your emotions while at the track? Do you completely zone out when other people are talking and just wait for your chance to respond? Are you having issues getting along with your team? Before you start, figure out what your end goal is and what you hope to achieve. Then as you start to learn more about the topic you can start to apply some of your learning to the specific thing you are trying to overcome.
3. TELL A FRIEND – Everything works better with a bit of accountability. Emotional intelligence work is no different. Find a friend or loved one that will be honest with you about your progress and where you are starting from. Maybe they can provide some insights that you might not expect. Maybe they even want to learn more about what you are exploring.
PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE
As with anything improving any aspect of emotional intelligence takes time. I started working on some of the specific areas I mentioned above almost two years ago and some I feel like I’ve grown so much and others I feel like I have barely moved the needle. Don’t get frustrated if things take longer than you expect.
Keep practicing, eventually the results will come.
FINAL THOUGHTS
Emotional intelligence has been suggested to be significantly more important in determining long term success than IQ. You have the ability to improve this and owe it to yourself to do so.
I’m happy to help in any way I can. Emotional intelligence is one of my main areas of specialization for both athletes and executives. Click here to schedule your complimentary call today to discuss your unique situation.